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This morning when I was looking around the gym observing numerous people running without a care in the world, I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach. I couldn't help but compare myself to them. I was jealous of the fact that they could run for as long as they liked without a care in the world and there I was wearing my supportive prolapse boxers walking on the treadmill. I felt jealous, angry and hateful towards my own body. I felt inadequate. I suddenly felt limited by my prolapse listing the things that I couldn't do at the gym and that others could. We compare constantly in our lives, most of the time these can result in unhealthy and negative thoughts about ourselves. Instagram has led to a wealth of comparisons providing us just with a snapshot of someone lives where they present us with highlights of their life and not the reality. Most of the women in magazines present unrealistic expectations of the 'perfect body' as most of them are photoshopped and edited thus we strive to achieve a unachievable body.
Living with prolapse can be challenging, it can test your relationship with your body. For me going to the gym really tests this relationship, especially when I compare myself to others. But what I have realised is that everyone is going through their own challenges, maybe they don't have prolapse, but this doesn't mean that their relationship with their body is not tested in other ways. Everyone has something they are insecure about or something they love about themselves a little less. Each person in the gym is going through their own personal challenges and insecurities, who knows they may even be looking at your body in jealousy.
So how can we stop comparing ourselves to others in the gym:
FOCUS ON YOUR OWN JOURNEY AND YOUR INDIVIDUAL GOALS It is important to focus on what is best for your body and work within your abilities rather than others. Yes, you probably could go and run as fast as others in the gym but at the end of the day, this could do more harm than good for you. By not running or doing other exercises that could make your prolapse worse you are respecting your body, your own boundaries and helping yourself in the long term. Everyone is different and have different constraints and goals. Focus on your goals and how YOU will achieve them. For all, you know the person next to you at the gym could be a professional runner or they could be unable to do other exercises due to their own medical conditions. Instead, FOCUS on what YOU CAN DO! Even individuals with prolapse have very differing exercise programmes and their own abilities. Nobody is the same and so there is no point comparing yourself to others. It is important to know what is best for your body and to work with that. Make sure that your goals are safe and healthy for you.
USE OTHERS AS A MOTIVATION
Channel all that anger or jealously you may have about someone being able to run and put all that energy into exercises and sports that you can do. Give 100% to the exercises that you can do instead of dwelling on those you cannot. Additionally, write down your personalised goals. These are your goals and nobody else's.
BUY CLOTHES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL CONFIDENT Admittingly this may be a recommendation because I am a shopaholic but one thing that has really helped me gain confidence in the gym is going in clothes that allow me to feel confident and comfortable. If I wanna wear just a sports bra to the gym then I will. I also wear clothing that supports my prolapse (EVB Sport) that has allowed me to exercise and feel confident and supported whilst doing so.
LIMIT YOUR TIME ON SOCIAL MEDIA My social media used to be filled with celebrities and women out of magazines but I realised that this wasn't healthy and whenever I turned on my Instagram I would constantly compare myself to those women and wish I looked like them. Now any accounts that make me question myself or make me think any less of myself I delete. Instead, I follow body positive Instagram's and accounts that promote a healthy body image rather than just of their assets. Follow accounts that show both the highs and the lows of their life and fitness journey. I also follow prolapse accounts and physio accounts which gives me a wealth of knowledge of exercising with prolapse. If you do find yourself comparing your own body and life to someone else's you see on the screen then think beyond the picture and realise that the camera often lies. They could just be using a really good angle, they could have edited the photo!
It is important not to compare yourself to others as we are all different. We all have different abilities, goals and constraints and so focus on your own goals and what is best for you. With prolapse, it is important not to dwell on what you cannot do but instead focus on what you can do and really channel all your energy into doing those.